Golden Age Truths

  1. Sometimes I’ll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.
  2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you’re wrong.Unknown
  3. I totally take back all those times I didn’t want to nap when I was younger.
  4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.
  5. How are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
  6. Was learning cursive really necessary?
  7. Map Quest or Google Maps really need to start their directions on #5.  I’m  pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
  8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
  9. I can’t remember the last time I wasn’t at least kind of tired.
  10. Bad decisions make good stories.
  11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment when you know that you just aren’t going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.
  12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blu-Ray?  I don’t want to have to restart my collection… again
  13. I’m always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that I swear I did not make any changes to.
  14. I keep some people’s phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
  15. I disagree with Kay Jewelers.  I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Light than Kay.
  16. I wish Google Maps had an “Avoid Ghetto” routing option.
  17. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.
  18. How many times is it appropriate to say “What?” before you just nod and smile because you still didn’t hear or understand a word they said?
  19. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front.  Stay strong, brothers and sisters!
  20. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey – but I’d bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time.
  21. The first testicular guard, the “Cup,” was used in Hockey in 1874 and the first helmet was used in 1974. That means it only took 100 years for men to realize that their brain is also important.
  22. I was in a Starbucks Coffee recently when my stomach started rumbling and I realized that I desperately needed to fart.  The place was packed, but the music was really loud so to get relief and reduce embarrassment I timed my farts to the beat of the music.  After a couple of songs I started to feel much better.  I finished my coffee and noticed that everyone was staring at me.  I  suddenly remembered that I was listening to my Ipod (with ear piece) – and how was your day?

How many of these can you claim?    Me?, All but three.

 

Thanks, Carla.

Advertisements

About Ray V.

Living in Aiken, South Carolina, USA, I like to share what I am looking at, thinking about or listening to. I refer to this as the view out my window. Thanks for stopping by.
This entry was posted in quotes, Uncategorized and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

11 Responses to Golden Age Truths

  1. Val Boyko says:

    The last one is the best!!! 😂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Reblogged this on Peter's pondering and commented:
    How many of these apply to you? I guarantee that there are more than a few!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. ivors20 says:

    I can lay claim to all of them except #15, Not relevant in Aussie land, and #22, I don’t wear ear-pieces, but I’ll still fart if the musics loud enough. !! I enjoyed the read….

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Love them all! especially laughed at the fart one LOL !!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Pingback: The Answers to Everything – 50: A Figment of my Imagination

  6. Margy says:

    #19. I won’t let the jerk in either – but there is always some kind soul, or easily intimidated person in front of me, that suddenly slows down and lets the interloper in. What I want someone to invent is a control device that I could zap the driver with. It would make them suddenly feel like they should safely pull over to the side of the road and take a 10 or 15 minute time out.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Some I’m willing to admin and some I’m not! The fart one made me laugh. I once did a project with the deaf community and one of the thing that characteristics them is that they just fart at will. I can’t say I ever got used to it!!!!!

    i’ve often wondered about the fitting sheet!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Everyone, including my daughters, but I’ve never been a fan of the word. Oh, well.

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s